The Fruits Basket Dare Show!
by Inu Anime Girl
Summary: [Discontiuned] Welcome to The Fruits Basket Dare Show hosted by me IAG and my co host LOTL come on in and do the most evil dare you can think of!
1. Episode 1

IAG- HAH I get to do my own disclaimer now so…… No matter how much I may want to I don't own the Fruits Basket cast nor d I own LOTL she belongs to herself.

LOTL- just so you know IAG is actually Inu Anime Girl and I'm actually Lauren Of The Lake.

IAG- I think they know that……

LOTL- so…..

IAG- Ok well let's get started, welcome to our Fruits Basket Dare Show where you can dare the cast to do anything (it's in their contract). Let's bring in the cast……..

(Cast comes in including Arisa, Hana, and all the Sohmas)

IAG- Hello everyone!

Everyone- Huh?

LOTL- Welcome to the Fruits Basket dare show where you have to do what we say!

Everyone- SAYS WHO!

IAG- The contract that was signed

Everyone- we never signed a contract

LOTL- actually for Arisa and Hana we tricked them and for the Sohmas Akito being head of the house signed it for you so HAH!

Kyo- why did you do that!

Akito- (shrugs)

IAG- ahem as I was saying I will quickly say the few rules there are….

We allow anything but if it's overboard then we don't have to put it up!

Uhhhh just say your dare in a review

include me and LOTL once and a while

LOTL – Untill then we will wait until we get our first dare (maly because we can't think of any)

IAG- Bye for now!

( "forever" by Veronicas starts playing as a background/ending song)


	2. Episode 2

IAG- Ok first I don't own Fruits Basket nor characters so… WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- Below is our first dare reviewed by Fayt Esteed…

Fayt Esteed I wanna dare Kyo to kiss Kagura for 1 minute!

Kyo- Wahhhhh!

Kagura- Aww now you can show how much you love me

IAG- oh this is going to be good………

Kyo- I REFUSE!

Kagura- But that's what lovers do ;(

LOTL- you have to anyway

Kyo- we're not lovers!

Kagura- Of course we are SILLY! (Starts to beat up Kyo)

IAG- oh no not my studio!

LOTL- someone stop them!

Shigure- do any of you really feel brave enough to try and stop them?

IAG- uhh…

LOTL- ENOUGH ALREADY!

(Kagura and Kyo stop)

IAG- there know anyway… KISS HER!

Kyo- NO!

IAG- hey Arisa can I borrow your iron pipe for a moment?

Arisa- sure

(IAG whacks Kyo on the head)

Kyo- ok I'll do it

LOTL- I got the camera o

Yuki- we need a video camera

Kyo- SHUT UP!

IAG- remember for 1 minute

(Kyo starts kissing Kagura)

IAG- 10 seconds

(Kyo twitches)

LOTL- 30 seconds

(Kyo turns green)

IAG- 50 seconds

(Shigure and Yuki are snickering)

LOTL- there you're done

(Kyo falls over choking)

Kagura- Kyo my love what happened to you?

Kyo- askfnkdbgkdfbgksdbn………I kissed you…………….

Kagura- but……but…….waaahhhhh Kyo you're so mean!

(Kagura starts to destroy him)

Tohru- Is Kyo going to be alright

Hatori- I'll probably have to do some serious work on him after this _I only take family as patients and I still get worked to death_

IAG- WAHHH my poor studio I'll kill you both!

(IAG starts chasing them both)

LOTL- hehe because of some minor difficulties that's all for today BYE FOR NOW

("Forever" starts playing in background)


	3. Episode 3

IAG- Hi all! First I don't own Fruits Basket and now WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- YAY we got seven different dares

Everyone- greeeaaaaaat

IAG- humph well the first one is from shortfry803

And, ah yes, I dare ... HM ... --thinks-- uh ... this may take a while ... --10 years later-- ah yeah I dare Shigure to spend 7 minutes in "heaven" with his editor. LOL! Update soon!

Mi- WHAT!

Yuki- when did you get here?

Shigure- Uhh…

Ayame- But Shigure you said you would never cheat on me…

Shigure- it's just a one-time thing (he says dramatically)

LOTL- Let's get on with it all ready!

IAG- YAH we DO have a show to run!

(A closet magically appears and Tohru's eyes bug out)

Tohru- ho- how did you do that?

IAG- I have the magical host power MUHAHAHAHAHA!

LOTL- oks you two IN!

Mi- this is hell this world hates me………

(IAG and LOTL shove them both in the closet)

Kisa- Sissy what does she mean by "heaven"

Tohru- uh err eh ah……..

IAG- Kisa! You're so cute! (Interception)

LOTL- Uh this might take a bit so let's get on to our next dare by Akito's Fan Girl..

Kyo- Akito has a fan girl?

IAG- DON'T INTERRUP

I dare Akito to eat 50 cakes and then do something stupid.

Akito- 50? (he twitches)

IAG- what kind of cake?

LOTL- How about chocolate fudge?

IAG- ok

(50 chocolate fudge cakes suddenly appear, Akito twitches again)

LOTL- go get them tiger!

Kisa- Hey!

Hatsuharu- this is so stupid…

IAG- if you weren't my favorite character I'd have to hurt you…

(Akito has eaten 1 cake)

Ayame- has it been 7 minutes yet?

Hatori- no it's been 6 minutes and 45 seconds

(Akito has eaten another cake only 48 more to go!)

Hatori- In my professional option that is VERY unhealthy

Hatsuharu- In ANYONE'S option that's unhealthy

Ayame- can we let them out yet!

IAG- YES!

(IAG with everyone behind her opens the door to see……..)

LOTL- takes a moment for the suspense

(They're playing Sevens)

IAG- WAHHHHHHH that wasn't worth it

(Everyone in the room sweat drops, Akito has eaten 10 cakes)

LOTL- SOO……. Uhh….

Shigure- HAH I won (does a little victory dance)

Kisa- so playing cards is "heaven"?

Momiji- Am I in a dare am I am I am ?

Kyo- SHUT UP! (noggies Momiji)

IAG- you guys cut it out on with the next dare by Sparkle Forever!

Hm

DARE YUKI TO HUG KYO FOR 2 MINUTES!

Kyo And Yuki- WHAATTT!

IAG- Hehe this is great

Kyo And Yuki- NEVER!

LOTL- you do know you guys are speaking in chorus ….

Kyo And Yuki- ARE NOT!

IAG- you guys are also speaking in capitals…

Tohru- hug?………

Kyo And Yuki- IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!

Ayame- my little brother is getting in touch we his romantic side (gets stars in eyes) o

(Akito has eaten 20 cakes and looking REALLY sick)

IAG- let the hugging begin

(IAG and LOTL came from two sides and push them together)

Kyo and Yuki- ARGGGHHHHHHH!

(Steam starts rising)

Tohru- what's going on?

Hana- I think they're melting…..

IAG- minute down……

(Akito has eaten 29 cakes)

Arisa- I think that Akito guy is going to die..

IAG- Cool!

LOTL- NOT COOL!

IAG- ok it's been 2 minutes

Kyo And Yuki- FINALLY!

(They both fall over)

Tohru- Kyo, Yuki are you all right?

(Tohru runs over Akito has eaten 35 cakes)

IAG- that was interesting if we did any longer they could be liquid right know….

Kyo- just do the next dare!

LOTL- you're not going to like it

Yuki- what is it?

IAG- it's from xAnimeDreamerx94……….

o have Kyo have to dance with Yuki for 15 mins to the waltz! lol.

(Tohru's eyes REALLY bug out, Hatsuharu twitches)

IAG- scary……

Hatori- very…….

(Akito has eaten 40 cakes)

(Waltz music comes on)

LOTL- should we make them wear outfits?

IAG- nah….

(LOTL and IAG push them together again)

IAG- Now dance!

Kyo And Yuki- NO!

IAG- Arisa can I borrow your pipe?

Kyo And Yuki- WE'LL DO IT!

(Kyo And Yuki start to dance)

Kagura- Isn't that cute?

IAG- shouldn't you be upset?

LOTL- Yah you "one and only love" is dancing with Yuki….

IAG- nice imitation

LOTL- Thanks

Kagura- not really

LOTL- We have to end the show here because all the other dare include either Akito or Kyo.

IAG- So see ya next time on THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Forever" starts playing you know the rest)


	4. Episode 4

IAG- I don't own anything but my computer, ps2, games, and the strange unknown thing in my room.

LOTL- and your mp3 player

IAG- Whatever WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- to fill you in Akito has one more cake to eat and Yuki and Kyo are almost done dancing.

Tohru- they're good

Hana- I sense strange electric currents going through the room….

LOTL- you always do….

IAG- Hey Akito's done!

(Everyone's attention goes to Akito)

Arisa- I think he's dead (pokes him with iron pipe)

Hatori- Make way (walks over to Akito with his medical bag)

Shigure- is he going to be all right?

Hatori- yes he'll be fine but he gained 1,000 pounds

IAG- WOW

Akito- I see a light at the end of a tunnel (his stupid line)

Hatsuharu- he's fine

IAG- you guys can stop dancing now

Kyo- Now I hate you more than ever (he says once again to Yuki)

Yuki- what else is new?

LOTL- let's get on to the next dare.

IAG- it's from x Fade x To x Black X

Hahaha.

I dare Akito to put on a spandex leather suit and then try to seduce Hana and Arisa.

Hehehehehe.

Hatori- lord help us

Everyone- (shudder)

IAG- ok let me get a suit

Akito- it's alright I have my own

LOTL- TOO MUCH INFO!

(Akito takes out a spandex leather suit)

IAG- go change in the closet

(Everyone waits a few minutes)

Akito- here I am!

(Akito come out in the suit)

Kyo- oh my 3&$&&& god

(Hatori covers Kisa and Hiro's eyes)

IAG- uggh now for the next part of the dare…

Akito- why don't two lovely ladies like you come with me (puts arms around Arisa and Hana)

Tohru- this is going to-

WHACK

SHOCK

BASH

ZZTTTTT

DESTROY!

Arisa- you son of a bitch!

Hana- you might be careful what you do you could regret it

Yuki- and he doesn't regret it now?

Hatori- make way (looks over Akito)

Ayame- is he all right?

Hatori- he'll live

Kyo- nuts

IAG- anyway……… someone takes him out of my studio and change him….

Everyone- not me!

LOTL- hey Hatori you do

Hatori- why me…..

IAG- I have this strange feeling we're missing someone

Ritsu- I'M SO SORRY I'M LATE I'M NOT WORTH YOU WAITING FOR ME!

LOTL- well that answers you question

IAG- Ritsu welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

Ritsu- NO I'M NOT WORTH BEING IN YOU SHOW!

IAG- that is going to get really annoying

Ritsu- OH NO I ANNOYED I'M SO SORYY I'M NOT WORTH LIVING

LOTL- here (hands IAG duct tape)

IAG- There that's better (duct taped his mouth shut)

LOTL- well anyway here's the next dare from Alana The Cat

This is hilarious! Update soon!

I dare Yuki to do a weird dance around the studio in his boxers! I don't why, but I think it would be fun to see!

IAG- well…

LOTL- uh….

Yuki- NEVER!

IAG- I don't know there are minors here

LOTL- it's not as bad as the leather suit

IAG- true…. Go change!

Yuki- NO!

(IAG shoves him in closet)

IAG- when you come out you better be in your boxers… I can't believe I just said that

LOTL- ok we might have time for a short dare from x Fade x To x Black x

Funny. )

I dare Momiji to...

say "I want to have intercourse with you! Oh yeah" to Hiro

Everyone- GASP!

Kisa- what does intercourse mean?

(Hatori comes in with Akito)

Hatori- what's new?

IAG- look up to see the next two dares

Hatori- o….

IAG- I repeat MINORS!

LOTL- oh well…

IAG- Because I feel like it (plus I have homework) that's today's episode of THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW! See ya next time!

("Forever" starts playing you know the rest)


	5. Episode 5

IAG- First I don't own Fruits Basket and WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- While Yuki is undressing Momiji has to say a certain thing to Hiro

Tohru- but they're still so young

IAG- it's what the dare says

LOTL- Ok Momiji fire away

Momiji- I want to have intercourse with you! Oh yeah

Hiro- uhh…………

(Yuki comes out in his boxers)

Girls- wow…

Boys- humph…

Yuki- do I really have to do this?

IAG- YES!

LOTL- NOW DANCE!

(Yuki starts dancing around the studio)

IAG- I bet this will help ratings!

Arisa- who wears polka dot boxers?

Yuki- YOU CAN'T SAY THAT ON AIR!

IAG- well she just did…

Yuki- can I go change now?

IAG- fine!

(Yuki goes to change)

LOTL- the next dare is from x Fade x To x Black x again

Everyone- greeaaat

IAG- well I like her she always send the best dares

Lord, you're hilarious.

I'm sending another dare. I think the fruits basket characters are going to add me to their List of People to Kill...oh well:)

I Dare Hatori to feel up Arisa and yell "I HIT THE MOTHERLOAD!"

Hahahaha.

Hatori- lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord, lord,…………..

IAG- I'll call the hospital

LOTL- not helping…. Better call emergency

Hatori- she's top of my people to kill list!

LOTL- go on!

Ayame- I hope he lives

Ritsu- (muffled apologies)

(Hatori walks up to Arisa and ahem feels her)

Arisa- (twitch)

Hatori- god help me I HIT THE MOTHERLOAD!"

Arisa- (TWITCH)

WHACK

BASH

BANG

CRACK

SLAP!

Arisa- YOU SICK BASTARD!

IAG- that was… VERY AMUSING!

LOTL- I think he died….

IAG- no he's still alive… I shall save him with my magic host power hahahaha!

(IAG zaps him with MHP aka Magic Host Power)

Hatori- groan

Shigure- are you all right

Hatori- medically speaking I should be dead

Arisa- you bet your ass you should

Tohru- do you need any help?

IAG- HELLO MYSHOW!

LOTL- the next dare is from Silver Moonlight

HI! GREAT STORY! HERE"S MY DARE (S):  
Kyo has to kiss Yuki for 5 minutes...so funny!  
Momiji has to...see ALL of his candy be destroyed  
Shigure has to see his books be destroyed  
Akito has to wear a girly frilly pink dress! (Yes Akito is a girl!)

Kyo And Yuki- NOOOOOOOO!

Momiji- WAHHHHH!

Shigure- ok…

Mii- NOO!

Everyone- you are?

Akito- I am?

IAG- you mean you don't know!

Akito- no not really

Everyone- o…

IAG- TOO MUCH INFO and anyway first ahem Kyo go kiss Yuki

Kyo And Yuki- NO!

LOTL- I really don't want to do this

Kyo And Yuki- THEN DON"T

LOTL- OH well…

(IAG and LOTL push them together)

Kyo And Yuki- I'M NOT GOING TO KISS HIM!

IAG- if you don't then I'll tell Tohru both of your deepest darkest secrets… with photos!

Kyo And Yuki- NOOO ANYTHING BUT THAT!

Tohru- huh?

IAG- then kiss!

Kyo And Yuki- (shudder)

(They. argghhh… kiss)

IAG- because this will take five minutes then we'll move on…

(IAG uses MHP and zaps all Momiji's candy here)

Momiji- sniff pwez don't do it

Tohru- isn't this a little cruel…

IAG. Uhh no (sets his candy on fire)

Momiji- WAHHHHHHHHHH!

Tohru- Awwww it's ok (tries to cheer him up)

LOTL- so touching…NOT now next

(IAG uses MHP and zaps all Shigure's books here)

Mii- NO DON'T DO IT!

Shigure- do you have any food here?

(IAG sets the books on fire and hands Shigure a banana)

Mii- NOOOOOOOOOO!

Shigure- thanks…wait are those my books!

LOTL- DUH!

Shigure- shit…

IAG- you guys can stop kissing now

(They move away and go to separate sides of the room)

Kyo- IF I EVER MEET YOU SILVER MOONLIGHT YOU WILL PAY!

IAG- now Akito although I don't want to know do you have your own dress?

Akito- yes…

LOTL- TOO MUCH INFO!

IAG- uggh go change

(Akito goes to change)

IAG- because I have MORE homework I have to end it here..

LOTL- soo..

IAG- See ya later!

("Forever" starts playing..)


	6. Episode 6

IAG- HI all I don't own Fruits Basket

LOTL- How many times must you say that?

IAG- each episode and WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

(Akito comes out in the dress)

Kyo- my eyes!

Ayame- that looks like one of the dresses in my shop

Akito- it is…

LOTL- TOO MUCH INFO!

IAG- I have another felling we're missing something

(Rin and Kureno come in)

LOTL- you must be physic or something

Hana- that's what I am

IAG- YOU! (Points at Rin)

Rin-…

(I HATE RIN! HARU IS MINE!)

IAG- everyone ignore that little note above…

Rin- I thought Haru and I broke up…

Shigure- you like Haru?

Hatsuharu- you like me?

IAG- I SAID IGNORE THE NOTE!

LOTL- opps we forgot a dare

IAG- which one?

LOTL- this one from Fayt Esteed

Ok! It's me again! Ok...I want to dare Kyo to eat lots and lots and lots and lots of leeks!

Kyo- I hate you

(IAG zaps 2 pounds of leeks here)

IAG- there eat up.

Yuki- (snicker)

Kyo- NO!

IAG- deepest secret… photos…Tohru…

Kyo- FINE!

Tohru- huh?

(Kyo starts to eat the leeks)

Kyo- uggh

IAG- because this might take a bit here's the next dare from echo-waters

Um... I dare Hatori to sing and dance to "my lumps" by black-eyed peas

Hatori- why what did I ever do to you?

(IAG zaps Hatori so that he knows the lyrics)

IAG- here's a microphone

(Hatori shudders than reluctantly starts to sing + dance perversely)

What you gon' do with all that junk?  
All that junk inside your trunk?  
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,  
Get you love drunk off my hump.  
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,  
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps. (Check it out)

I drive these brothers crazy,  
I do it on the daily,  
They treat me really nicely,  
They buy me all these ices.  
Dolce & Gabbana,  
Fendi and NaDonna  
Karan, they be sharin'  
All their money got me wearin' fly  
But I ain't askin,  
They say they love my ass 'n,  
Seven Jeans, True Religion's,  
I say no, but they keep givin'  
So I keep on takin'  
And no I ain't taken  
We can keep on datin'  
I keep on demonstrating.

My love, my love, my love, my love  
You love my lady lumps,  
My hump, my hump, my hump,  
My humps they got u,  
She's got me spending.  
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.  
She's got me spendin'.  
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me

What you gon' do with all that junk?  
All that junk inside that trunk?  
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,  
Get you love drunk off my hump.  
What u gon' do with all that ass?  
All that ass inside them jeans?  
I'm a make, make, make, make you scream  
Make u scream, make you scream.  
Cos of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.  
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps. (Check it out)

I met a girl down at the disco.  
She said hey, hey, hey yea let's go.  
I could be your baby, you can be my honey  
Let's spend time not money.  
I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,  
Milky, milky cocoa,  
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.

They say I'm really sexy,  
The boys they wanna sex me.  
They always standing next to me,  
Always dancing next to me,  
Tryin' a feel my hump, hump.  
Lookin' at my lump, lump.  
U can look but you can't touch it,  
If you touch it I'ma start some drama,  
You don't want no drama,  
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama  
So don't pull on my hand boy,  
You ain't my man, boy,  
I'm just tryn'a dance boy,  
And move my hump.

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,  
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.  
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)  
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)  
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)  
In the back and in the front (lumps)  
My lovin' got u,  
She's got me spendin'.  
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.  
She's got me spendin'.  
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me.

What you gon' do with all that junk?  
All that junk inside that trunk?  
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,  
Get you love drunk off my hump.  
What you gon' do with all that ass?  
All that ass inside them jeans?  
I'ma make, make, make, make you scream  
Make you scream, make you scream.  
What you gon do with all that junk?  
All that junk inside that trunk?  
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,  
Get you love drunk off this hump.  
What you gon' do wit all that breast?  
All that breast inside that shirt?  
I'ma make, make, make, make you work  
Make you work, work, make you work.

She's got me spendin'.  
Spendin all your money on me and spendin' time on me  
She's got me spendin'.  
Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me

Everyone- ooo……..

IAG- I will know say how much I HATE THE BLACK EYED PEAS AND EPECIALLY THATSONG!

LOTL- I already knew that……..

Kagura- hey Kyo's done eating all those leeks….

Kyo- Hatori tell me the truth am I going to die

Hatori- well to tell the truth that was the healthiest thing you could have done

Kyo- OMFG

IAG- HEY watch you language!

LOTL- well the next dare is from Young Mitsuki

LOL! Hilarious!

My dare: Hmm...make Ritsu shut up for at least an hour or 30 minutes.  
or  
Ayame cuts his hair  
or  
Hana wears a bright colored dress, dies her hair blonde, and ask one of the Sohmas am I pretty?

IAG- hmmm I will pick….

(dramatic pause)

IAG- Ayame has to cut his hair

Everyone- uh ok (except Ayame)

Ayame- NOOOOOO STAY AWAY!

IAG- don't worry I can cut hair pretty good……. (holds scissors menacingly)

(IAG grabs Ayame and starts hacking away)

Yuki- o…

IAG- there how does he look….

LOTL- scary….

Ayame- my hair…..my hair……my poor hair…hair…..hair….

Hatori- I think he's gone insane

Ayame- my hair….hair…hair…

IAG- next dare from iujhnjnjkngjkl

I dare Tohru to kiss Yuki and Kyo!

(Tohru, Yuki, and Kyo's eyes POP out)

IAG- wow…..both I was hoping for only one …..oh well

Arisa- gggrrrrrrrrr (takes out pipe)

Hana- (electricity around her head)

Kyo- uhhhhhhhhh……..

Yuki- uhhhhhhhh………

Tohru- uhhhhhhh……….

IAG- because they seem stuck in place we'll have to end it here so tune in next for THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Forever" starts playing)


	7. Episode 7

IAG- Do not own Fruits Basket and let me tell you HOW HARD IT IS TO DO THIS WHEN I'M DROWNING IN SCHOOL WORK!

LOTL- whatever…

IAG- oh yeah WELCOME TO THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!…..where were we?

LOTL- Tohru has to kiss Yuki and Kyo

Tohru- uhhhhhhh

Yuki- uhhhhhhhh

Kyo- uhhhhhhh

IAG- ok I have a lot of dares to put up so just kiss!

LOTL- I think Tohru is mentally freaking out….

Ayame- Yuki is getting in touch with his romantic side!

Hatori- actually he isn't…..

Yuki- stop talking about me!

IAG- I said someone kiss NOW!

Kyo- FINE!

(Kyo quickly kisses Tohru)

Kagura- No it's me you really love it's only the dare!

IAG- is that…… I thought Tohru has to kiss THEM

Kagura- that means nothing!

LOTL- oh well it's fine

IAG- Now you! (points at Yuki)

Yuki- FINE!

(Yuki also quickly kisses Tohru)

Momiji- hey look Tohru's face is five different shades of red

(Yuki and Kyo glare at each other)

IAG- moving on next dare is from Broken And Fallen Angel Of Death

I dare Hatori to sing 'I'm N Luv Wit A Stripper' by T-Pain and have Ayame and Shigure dance to it. I dare Kyo to act like he loves Yuki for the first hour, pretend to be nice to him the second hour, and pretend nothing happened for the rest of the show. Update soon!

Hatori- what is it with people and making me sing

Ayame + Shigure- we get to dance!

(IAG zaps Hatori so he know the lyrics)

Goddamn Lil Mama  
U know u thick as hell u know what I'm sayin  
Matter fact  
After the club u know what I'm talkin bout  
Me and my niggas gone be together u know what I'm sayin  
I ain't gon worry bout them really though  
I'm just lookin at u  
Yea u know  
U got them big ass hips god damn!

_Verse 1_

Got the body of a goddess  
Got eyes butter pecan brown I see you girl  
Droppin Low  
She Comin Down from the ceiling  
To tha floo  
Yea She Know what she doin  
Yea yea yea  
She doin that right thang  
Yea yea yea yea ea  
I Need to get her over to my crib and do that night thang  
Cause I'm N Luv wit a stripper

_Chorus x2_

She poppin she rollin she rollin  
She climbin that pole and  
I'm N Luv with a stripper  
She trippin she playin she playin  
I'm not goin nowhere girl I'm stayin  
I'm N Luv with a stripper

_Verse 2 (T-Pain)_  
Out of all the girls she be the hottest  
Like n the way she break it down I see u girl  
Spinnin wide  
And She lookin at me  
Right in my eyes  
Yea She got my attention  
Yea yea yea  
Did I forget to mention  
I Need to get her over to my crib and do that night thang  
Cause I'm N Luv Wit a Stripper

_Verse 3 (Mike Jones)_  
She's every man's dream  
She's God's gift to Earth  
Women they love 'em too  
That's what you call a women's worth  
See I love all the strippers  
Because they show me love  
They know I never pay as free whenever I hit the club  
But I can't even lie  
The girls are here so fly  
She slidin' up and down that pole got me mesmerized  
Mike Jones don't ever trick  
But god damn she thick  
I can't lie, I must admit  
I'm in love with a stripper

_Chorus x2_

_Verse 4_

She can pop it she can lock it  
Teddy Penderass down I'm bout to see this sexy girl  
In My bed  
She don't know what she is doin  
To my head  
Yea She turnin tricks on me  
Yea Yea Yea  
She dont even know me  
Yea yea yea ea  
I'd have got her over to my crib to do that night thing  
Cause I'm N Luv Wit a Stripper

LOTL- that was…

IAG- disturbing…

Kisa- Grandpa Hatori is a good singer…..

Akito- I hate it when I'm not the center of attention

IAG- Ok now Kyo has to do all the Yuki stuff

Yuki- lord….

Kyo and if I don't

IAG- secret….photos…Tohru..

Tohru- huh?

Kyo- FINE….

LOTL- well?

Kyo- Yuki my love!

Shigure- he sounds like The Yuki Fan Club

Hatori- or Kagura

Kagura- no not another rival! Kyo it's me you really love right this is just because of the dare right right!

IAG- well another one from x fade x To x Black x

Everyone- groan

I send the best dares, do I? evil smile

I dare Hiro to lick Hanajima's hand and then Hanajima punch her chest like Godzilla and yell "I AM ACTUALLY A MAN!" and then...  
I dare Akito to pie Kyo in the face and then French kiss Tohru!

You guys rock. Muahaha.

IAG- Well first..

Hiro- I'm a ram not a dog!

Kisa- please do it Hiro

Hiro-……..

IAG- yah kid do it for your pint size girlfriend

Hiro- fine……..she's no my girlfriend

Kisa- I'm not pintsized!

(Hiro reluctantly walks over to Hana and uggh licks her hand)

ZAP!

Hiro- OWW!

Kisa- oh no Hiro are you all right?

Hiro-NO!

IAG- well next…

ZAP!

BBZZTTTTTT!

(IAG is smoking on the ground)

Everyone- YAY she's dead let's hurry and go!

LOTL- now wait I have MCHP (magic co host power) let me try and use

(LOTL zaps IAG)

IAG- ow that hurt hey you used your power………… I HAVE A TAIL YOU IDIOT!

LOTL- opps

IAG- uhh maybe we should skip Hana for now

Hana- good choice

IAG- Now Akito has to-

Kyo- NO!

Akito- this will be nice

(IAG zaps a banana cream pie here)

Akito- thanks

(Akito throws the pie at Kyo, which hits him in the face)

Yuki- cat like reflexes yeah…right…

(Kyo starts to fiercely wipe pie off his face)

Ritsu- I'M SORRYYYY!

IAG- hey how'd he get the tape off?

(IAG tapes his mouth shut again)

LOTL- and last…………

(Akito grabs Tohru and French kisses her)

Kyo and Yuki- WHY YOU!

Momiji- I was right everyone likes Tohru

IAG- I wonder if it was anyone else but Akito what they would do to him

LOTL- kill him…..

IAG- next dare is from Silver Moonlight

Haha!Thz for putting my dares! Here's more! -evil grin- MWAHAHAHA  
Okay Yuki has to...hug his brother for 10 min. (haha Let's see how his brother reacts...)  
Kyo...has to wear a frilly shirt and tux.  
Ayame...ALL of his clothes in his store is to be burned to the ground along with his store.  
Rin...has to wear a pink long frilly dress with lace trimmings!

Yuki- WTF!

Ayame- YAY!

Kyo- MF!

Ayame- NOOOOOOO!

Rin- NO FUCKING WAY!

IAG- HAHA Rin has to wear a preppy dress HAHA!

Rin- Fuck off!

LOTL- these people have very bad language……

IAG- I repeat MINORS and how come we can see when Rin swears

LOTL- I dunno

Ayame- Come brother so that we may bond

Yuki- no……

IAG- you have to…..

(IAG and LOTL push Yuki to Ayame)

LOTL- how long do they have to stay there?

Hatori- 10 minutes

IAG- well let me zap to Ayame's shop to get Kyo and Rin's outfits

(IAG zaps away for a moment then comes back with girly outfits)

IAG- here you guys go change

Kyo- there's only one closet

(IAG zaps another)

IAG- THERE!

Yuki- how much longer!

Hatsuharu- 8 minutes …..

(Kyo and Rin come out)

IAG- AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Rin- shut the hell up!

Kyo- shut up!

IAG- now we burn all Ayame's cloth stuff so you two change out of those but first…..

(Takes out camera and takes a photo)

Rin- you bitch!

Kyo- give me that!

IAG- Uhh …..yeeeno

Tohru- I think you look good Kyo

Kyo- are you kidding who wears this stuff!

Yuki- now how much longer!

Hatori- 3 minutes

IAG- just go change and Akito where's that dress you were wearing?

Kureno- he's still wearing it

LOTL- SICK!

IAG- GO CHANGE OUT OF IT!

Akito- fine killjoy

(Akito goes in as Kyo and Rin get out)

IAG- Aww they changed oh well I still have the photo..

Yuki- are we done yet!

IAG- yes

(Akito come out)

Ayame- I will never forget that moment of brotherly love

IAG- yes you will I'm burning all your clothing stuff

Ayame- NOOOO!

IAG- here give those to me (clothes are given to IAG)

IAG- there I will zap me and Ayame to his store while LOTL will stay here so you can see what's going on.

(They zap there)

Ayame- Mine get out here hurry!

Mine- what is it boss?

Ayame- this evil woman is going to burn our store!

Mine- what you can't!

IAG- oh well

(IAG sets it on fire)

IAG- Did I mention I once set a fridge on fire it was cool

Ayame- o….

LOTL- I remember that story you covered a fridge you found with cooking oil then stole some matches and-

IAG- LOTL! There are children here

Yuki- something tells me we don't want to know….

Ayame + Mine- NOO NOT THE SHOP!

(IAG zaps back with Ayame and Mine back to the studio)

IAG- I hate those kinds of stores anyway

Ayame- first my hair then my shop what next!

Mine- whoa boss your hair

LOTL- you just noticed…….

IAG- next dare from shortfry803

I dare Kyo to tell his most embarrassing memory! ;)

Kyo- NO!

IAG- I'm sorry but that's my blackmail I can't use that……. I'M SO SORRY!

Hatori- you sound like Ritsu……

IAG- OMG I DO!

LOTL- well the next dare is from iujhnjnjkngjkl

I dare Kyo to sleep with Tohru for 5 weeks

Everyone- OMFG!

Kagura- NO WAY IN HELL!

Kyo + Tohru- NO!

IAG- wow did Tohru talk back….

LOTL- there's a first time for everything

Yuki- you can't seriously be considering it!

IAG- too bad they have to do it…..contract plus……blackmail….

Tohru + Kyo- o……

IAG- well each episode is a day so……. 5x7 35 episodes so 35+742 so episode 42 they stop sleeping in the same bed doing god knows what…..

Shigure- good thing I got her the big bed….

Kyo- YOU ARE SO FULL OF IT!

IAG- well the next dare is from Broken And Fallen Angel..

I want both Yuki and Kyo to strip down to their boxers and hug each other without cursing after or threatening for an hour after. Make it as long as you want but the maximum is 5 minutes. Update soon!

Kyo- of course I'll hug my love!

Kagura- NO THAT'S ME!

Yuki- (shudder)

IAG- NOW DO IT! START STRIPPING………. I can't believe I just said that…

(Yuki and Kyo start stripping)

Girls- WHISTLE

Boys- grumble

IAG- now hug!

Kyo- only if Yuki wants too (second hour)

LOTL- just do it!

(Yuki and Kyo hug)

Yuki- how long!

IAG- 5 minutes

Hatsuharu- what is it with dares and hugging?

IAG- I have homework AGAIN so we shall end it here

LOTL- and we have a quick host note

IAG + LOTL- HOW COME WE"RE NOT IN ANY OF THE DARES! WE WANT ATTENTION!

Everyone- o……

IAG- Ok see you next time for THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Gone With The Sin" by HIM starts playing)

I love your skin oh so white  
I love your touch cold as ice  
And I love every single tear you cry  
I just love the way you're losing your life

Ohohohohoh my Baby, how beautiful you are  
Ohohohohoh my Darling, completely torn apart  
You're gone with the sin my Baby and beautiful you are  
So gone with the sin my Darling

(The song is cut off)

IAG- So sorry wrong cd Hehe

Kyo- you listen to that crap!

IAG- HEY DO I INSULT YOUR MUSIC!

("Forever" starts playing while IAG is beating up Kyo for insulting her music)


	8. Episode 8

IAG- HI! Welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- and a slight warning that IAG-

IAG- shut up!

Momiji-?

LOTL- IAG just got over a cold so she may be a little strange

Yuki- how?

LOTL- she'll be strangely emotional

Hatori- I'll be the judge of that

IAG- that I'm emotional?

Hatori- if you got over your cold…

IAG- o……….

(Hatori takes IAG's temperature)

Hatori- well you _seem _normal…

Ritsu- I'M SO SORRY IT'S MY FAULT THAT YOU WERE SICK I'M NOT WORTH LIVING!

IAG- WAHHH he's so pathetic it's sad and cute at the same time

(IAG hugs Ritsu and there's no pop)

LOTL- MHP (she reminds aka Magic Host Power)

Shigure- so that's what she meant…

(Kyo comes in the room on crutches)

Kagura- my love what happened to you?

Kyo- IAG hurt me for insulting her music

IAG- no one insults my music………is that guy that insulted Evanescence out of the hospital yet?

Everyone- o…

IAG- well here's a dare from Kitkit Sohma (who is actually a friend of mine mad at me for abusing Kyo)

Hm.. dare...  
1. Haru to kiss uhh...Kisa!  
2. Points to Akito I dare 'it' to tell us what 'it' really is!  
3. I dare Hatori to run around the studio screaming 'I'm a pervert!'

IAG- well if it's Kisa……….

LOTL- ok Haru kiss Kisa

Haru- she's like three years younger than me

Hiro- what kind of no life would make a dare like that?

Kisa- (major blush)

IAG- just kiss her!………………I can't believe I just said that

(Haru kisses her quickly and when walks back is tripped by Hiro)

Haru- why you little punk!

Yuki- oh great he went black..

Kisa- Sissy was it my fault?

Tohru- no of course not

IAG- oh she's so cute I LOVE HER! (Not in the gay way)

(IAG hugs Kisa)

Haru- I going to rip out that little punk mouth of yours

Hiro- I'd like to see you try cow

IAG- he's so cool when he goes black (stars in eyes)

LOTL- ok…. Moving on so Akito what are you?

IAG- a girl or boy?

Akito- uhh…

IAG- what's with the uhh?

Akito- I don't know..

IAG- WAIT! YOU DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE A GIRL OR BOY!

LOTL- sick….

Ayame- I meet a lot of people like that

Yuki- that's because your shop is for people like that

Mine- WAS! (Hates IAG)

IAG- HAVE CAN YOU NOT KNOW WHAT GENDER YOU ARE…..forget I asked

LOTL- uhh that's for another day (LOTL- I think he's a boy)

(Haru and Hiro still fighting in the back)

IAG- now Hatori has to run around my studio yelling "I'm a pervert"

Ayame- I would say that he was only naughty when he thought of Tohru in that cute dress

Mine- oh yes "it" was a beautiful dress (wistful thinking)

Tohru + Kyo + Yuki- huh?

Ayame- yes we would have had quite fun dressing up Tohru….

IAG- well just do it

Hatori- lord what do these people have against me?

Shigure- let me get the camera

(Shigure runs out to get a camera)

LOTL- Hatori you better do it before he gets back

(Hatori starts running around the studio)

IAG- and……..

Hatori- I'M A PERVERT!

(Shigure comes in)

Shigure- damn I missed it

IAG- oh quit wining! Next dare from can'tletcastknowmyrealname

Cast- that can't be good…

Uh...well, since no one else did any dares with you two in them, I'll give 2 or 3 dares...

1. LOTL has to wear...the exact thing she hates! (I don't know if you prefer bright clothes or dark, so it's just the opposite of whichever one you usually prefer...)

2. IAG has to kiss someone chosen by...LOTL! (Be lucky I said her and not Yuki or Kyo like I planned on saying...)

well, I save my other dare ideas for later

later

IAG + LOTL- o…

IAG- well LOTL here's a bag with your least favorite clothing in it Hehe

LOTL- sigh if I have to……..

(LOTL goes into closet)

IAG- well because the 2nd dare involves her than we wait.. Oh and whoever entered this dare THANK YOU FOR NOT MAKING IT KYO OR YUKI!

LOTL- uh I'm coming out now

(LOTL comes out in a pink tank top and a jean mini skirt)

Everyone- O……..

IAG- you look…..uh nice

LOTL- please don't you hate these clothes as much as I do

IAG- well pink is…………. DIGUSTING! (It makes my skin burn)

LOTL- remember camp when the counselor made you wear that pink shirt

IAG- yes NEVER BRING THAT UP AGAIN!…Now (shudder) the second dare who LOTL do you want me to (shudder) kiss?

LOTL- hmmmmm rat boy!

IAG + Yuki- WHAT?

LOTL- just kidding… hmm

IAG- whew

LOTL- ok you kiss…….. AKITO!

IAG- WHAT! I HAVE TO KISS "IT"

LOTL- yup

IAG- shudder

Akito- (indifferent in the subject)

LOTL- if you do I'll (whispers in her ear)

IAG- ok ok fine

(Haru and Hiro come back from the back)

Tohru- oh are you guy's hurt

Haru- no…….

Hiro- why do you even ask…you think that fake caring will work

Kyo- don't talk to her like that!

(While no one is looking IAG kissed Akito)

IAG- HAH!

LOTL- CHEATER!

IAG- but I kissed "it" didn't I

Akito- (nods)

Everyone- (puts away camera)

IAG- next dare from Broken And Fallen Angel again

I think you're going to enjoy this. I dare IAG and LOTL to hug their fav characters, and they (the characters)can't fight back. They can't curse or threaten you (not like it would matter anyway cuz you guys have powers). I dare Hatori to let Shigure and Ayame to the MOST ANNOYING thing to him and not complain. I dare Hiro to confess his love for Kisa in front of you all! My dare was quite...disturbing. Update soon!

IAG- YAY

LOTL- HMM?

IAH- I get to hug Haru!

Haru- uh……..

IAG- who are you going to hug LOTL

LOTL- hmm let me think about that for a while

IAG- well in that case

(Hugs Haru happily)

Everyone- o…

Haru- uhh….

Shigure- aren't you going to hug someone?

LOTL- when I think of the right person….

(IAG finally let's go of Haru)

IAG- ok next part-

Hatori- no..

Shigure- but it'll be fun!

Ayame- yeah it'll be fun!

LOTL- Now I know who I'll hug

IAG- who?

LOTL- Kyo!

Kagura- WHAT!

(LOTL hugs Kyo slowly)

Kyo- (surprised)

IAG- well Ayame and Shigure start the annoying

(Shigure and Ayame dance around him poking him)

Hatori- …………..

Kisa- you- you love me?

Hiro- ……………

IAG- come one tell the truth!

Hiro- uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh …………yes

Everyone- Aww……(except Akito)

Akito- NO NOTHING CAN HAPPEN WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!

IAH- oh shut up!

(LOTL stops hugging Kyo)

LOTL- uh IAG?

(IAG leaning against the wall)

IAG- headache feel sicker need ice end show!

LOTL- well that's it for now see you next time on THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Forever" starts playing)


	9. Episode 9

IAG- Hi everyone Welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- Sorry it took us so long to continue

IAG- Because I got sick again…

LOTL- I told you I could handle it

IAG- MY show! But now I'm fine I don't even have a hangover

Everyone- praise the lord…

IAG- now where were we?

LOTL- I think we do a new dare.

IAG- Ok and to all you reviewers out there if we forget your dare sorry just remind us and we'll put it u…now from Wolfboy (also a friend)

Scratch that last dare...I dare Yuki to put on a girl leather suit and sit in Ayame's lap trying to convince him that he loves him

IAG- OMG!

Yuki- NO!

Ayame- well I can't say I like leather but come my brother show your older brother how you feel!

IAG- how can someone not like leather? Oh and to remind you the first dare he said was that me and LOTL had to French kiss Ayame but it was scratched so HAH!

LOTL- I don't know but here's the suit and let's do a dare from iujhnjnjkngjkl while we wait

I dare IAG to rebuild Ayame's shop.

IAG- what?

Ayame + Mine- HA! Such a lovely store cannot be destroyed for long!

IAG- do I have to?

LOLL- it's in the dare.

IAG- fine (snaps her fingers think Shiva in FFX) there it's fixed

Ayame- Oh thank you!

Mine- and to show our appreciation why don't we dress you up?

IAG- NOOOOOO! STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!

(Yuki comes out)

Everyone- WHOA!

Yuki- laugh and you die!

IAG- now go and convince your brother you love him…….and his laugh

Yuki- you'll pay

(Yuki goes on Ayame's lap)

Yuki- you are the greatest person in the world..

Hatori- this is dangerous..

Tohru- huh how come?

Hatori- he'll inflate his already over inflated ego

Kyo- wow never thought of that

Yuki- you are a model to everybody

LOTL- this is scary…

IAG- ok that's enough please excuse me while I clean out the inside of my brain.

(IAG exits for a moment, Yuki walks into the closet)

LOTL- well while we wait let's see the next dare from Echo-Waters

Make Hatori get in a frilly princess dress and skip around throwing flowers

make Hiro say "Tohru is the nicest, prettiest, smartest, kindest, loveliest, generous girl in the world"

Hatori- I don't know how much more of this I can take………

(Yuki comes out)

Hiro- why would I want to say something like that?

LOTL- here Hatori go change

(IAG comes back in)

IAG- (looks up) what interesting dares

Kyo- this show is abuse!

IAG- I know isn't it fun and Hiro go on say it

Hiro- why you can't make me

IAG- you want to bet (whispers something in his ear)

Hiro- but how did you- fine I'll say it……………………………..

IAG- well?

Hiro- Tohru is the nicest, prettiest, smartest, kindest, loveliest, generous girl in the world…

Kisa- oh Hiro I'm so happy you said that (hugs Hiro)

Hiro- not like I said that on purpose…

Tohru- Oh I'm not really that great…(blushing like mad)

(Hatori comes out)

LOTL- oh we almost forgot here's your flower basket

Hatori- (twitches)

IAG- well? Dance around the studio

Hatori- why are these people obsessed with me?

(Hatori starts to dance around the studio and throw flowers and stuff)

IAG- I think the world hates him….

LOTL- whatever you can go change now… next dare from xFadexToxBlackx again

Everyone- RUN AWAY!

You shouldn't of mentioned that you want to be in a dare. Muahaha. Teehee. Kidding.

I dare Yuki to yell, "AYAME IS MY SE.X GOD!"

That is all. : )

IAG- Fade I hope you remember who your friends are!

Yuki- WHY? CAN'T YOU PEOPLE TELL I HATE MY BROTHER!

Shigure- I was saying that about Ayame long ago…

LOTL- o…..

IAG- just get it over with

Yuki- ………………….

IAG- just do it so we can continue

Yuki- Ayame is my sex god!

Ayame- yes it's true!

IAG- oh god shut up!

LOTL- well next is from Shinjite

P.S. If the writer is reading this, I have 3 dares, chose one.  
1. Kyo shows his "true form" to everyone…or  
2. Hana dresses like a girly-girl…or  
3. KYO AND YUKI TAKE A LIE DETECTOR TEST!  
(Oh, and one of the five questions you give them has to be do they have a crush on Tohru. MUHAHAHAHA!)

IAG- I think I'll pick the lie detector one

Yuki + Kyo- WHAT? WHY?

LOTL- oh great they're talking in chorus again

Yuki+Kyo- Are not!

(IAG makes a lie detector appear)

IAG- I have SOO much homework to do so this ends part one oh and to add please make your reviews/dares on the latest chapter or I might not see them ok? And please I have so many dares to add hold off till the next chapter please thanks!

LOTL- see ya next time in THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Forever" starts playing)


	10. Episode 10

IAG- Sigh hi all welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- we have a bunch of dares to get through

IAG- now where were we?

LOTL- I think that we do the lie detector test

IAG- cool, come on boys let's hook you up

(IAG and LOTL grab them both and hook them to the machine)

IAG- oh muhahahahahahahaha let's begin with question one: do you have a crush on Tohru?

Yuki-……………

Kyo- No why the hell would I!

LOTL- whoa that one almost broke the machine!

IAG- sooooo Kyo you do like Tohru interesting

Tohru- uh what?

Kyo- it's lie!

IAG- Yuki are you going to answer the question do you like Tohru yes or no TELL US NOW!

LOTL- uh…

Yuki- …….yes…………

Tohru- (eyes bug out of head)

IAG- so both boys like Tohru………………..

Tohru- nonononononononononono that can't be true I'm not special enough why two great boys like them like me…(goes on and on)

IAG- well moving on questions two: do you ever have gay thoughts?

Yuki- no

Kyo- no

LOTL- it's neutral!

IAG- what's that mean?

LOTL- means I don't know….

IAG- drat ….uh question three: have you guys ever had a girlfriend?

Kyo- errrr…….uh yeah

Yuki- no

LOTL- Kyo's lying Yuki's telling the truth

Kagura- what about me!

IAG- you don't count…. Question four: have you guys ever been in trouble with the police?

Yuki- sigh no

Kyo- uhhhhhhh …….no

LOTL- Yuki's telling the truth and Kyo is…………lying

Shigure- ooooo what did you do?

Kyo- shut up you're so full of it!

IAG- I think we all want to know……….

Hatori- he beat up a bunch of kids at school then they called the police he has a criminal record for that and more..

Kyo- who asked you bastard!

Everyone- o………….

Yuki- stupid cat…..

IAG- and now…drum roll please……………….question five: have you ever had thoughts about Tohru?

Everyone- gasp!

Yuki- NO!

Kyo- NO WAY IN HELL!

LOTL- Hehe they're both lying…

Shigure- who knew I had such perverts in my home

Momiji- ha-ha Kyo's a pervert

Kyo- shut up you damn happy rabbit…

IAG- I wonder what Tohru will think of these two now…I wonder, which she'll, chose hmmmmmmmmmm………………

LOTL- hmmm I wonder…well the next dare from Maya Sohma….

TeeHee! This is hilarious! Um let's see...  
1. I dare Momiji to hug Kyo for 10 minutes!  
2. IAG to kiss Hatsuharu for hours (I hope your happy! you fill in the blank)  
3. Kagura has to. Evil grin say, "I HATE KYOU!" really loud!

Ok that's all! PLEASE UPDATE SOON!

IAG- whoever you are THANK YOU!

LOTL- the lip locking session will be last ok?

IAG- fine…. First Kagura's thing

Kagura- no don't make me saw such awful things

IAG- let me remind you he likes Tohru, he hates you, he yelled at you in public and he forgot about that memory between you two.

Kyo- huh?

Kagura you're right sniff… I HATE KYO!

Kyo- yes!

IAG- jerk………ok Momiji hug Kyo for 10 minutes

Momiji- ok (hugs Kyo)

Kyo- why you little…

IAG- hey behave! Don't hurt the bunny

LOTL- so how long you going to kiss Haru?

Hatsuharu- ……………………(shocked)

IAG- only one hour

LOTL- your self-restraint amazes me I thought you might make it forever..

IAG- I do have to run but during that hour you will have to host the show

LOTL- cool I get a one-hour promotion…

Hatsuharu- (doesn't know wither to be glad or disappointed)

(IAG shyly starts kisses Haru)

LOTL- cool I get to host the show for a while well while we wait let's do the next dare…from wait no…can't do that one.. Ok from Tatsumi's Chick….

...Since Yuki and Hatori are my favorite characters I think...they should tell their most darkest secrets...and Akito must admit that she is a girl! (I know I read!) I just wanted to say "Hi Ayame...you inspire me!" and Ayame I dare you to pick between Hatori and Shigure and hug them for 3 minutes . Update ASAP!

(A/N- I don't know their real deep dark secrets so I'll make some up muhahahaha oh and I know he's a girl but this is MY show I can change people muhahahaha)

Ayame- thank you thank you I glad my perfected imagination inspires so many….

LOTL- ok Yuki you go first what is one of your deepest darkest secrets….

Yuki- uhh……. I once had a dream…

LOTL- and……….

Yuki- everyone I knew was in it……

LOTL- and…

Yuki- they had no clothes

Shigure- Yuki I'm so surprised that you are such a pervert….what did Tohru look like…

WHACK!

Shigure- Yuki's being cruel again

LOTL- so Hatori what's you secret

Shigure- no beating around the bush now…

Hatori- once every month I…

LOTL- you….

Hatori- I spy on Kana…

Shigure- I side of Hari we've never seen!

LOTL- whoa well moving on Akito do you have any thing you wish to admit

Akito- I'm telling you I don't know what I am

Yuki- if he's a girl then I think I'll kill myself…

LOTL- ok well Ayame pick who you want to hug…. speaking of hugging Momiji you can stop now

Kyo- stupid punk (whacks Momiji)

LOTL- I'd update on the IAG session but err it's not my place

Ayame- I pick..HARI!

Hatori- lord…

Shigure- Aaya how could you?

(Ayame smothers Hatori)

LOTL- now that's scary……….

(waits three minutes)

LOTL- ok you're done

(Ayame reluctantly lets go)

LOTL- next dare from…………..can'tletcastknowmyrealname

Everyone- OH NO NOT THEM WHOEVER THEY ARE!

I got another one! here it is(it's two part):

part 1: Kyo picks someone that Yuki has to kiss  
part 2: Yuki picks someone that Kyo has to kiss

that's all for now!

later

Yuki- Kagura

Kyo- Rin

Kyo- why you damn rat!

Yuki- stupid cat!

Shigure- let me get my camera

LOTL- just stay here! Ok you four kiss!

Rin- why the hell do I have to kiss Akito's pet

Yuki- don't call me that!

Kagura- come my love we've done this before

LOTL- just do it quickly we have more dares

(Kyo quickly kisses Kagura)

Kagura- that was short!

LOTL- come on Yuki we have stuff to do……

Yuki- I hate you

(Yuki kisses Rin)

Kisa- a half hour

LOTL- what?

Kisa- they have a half hour left

LOTL- you mean you've been counting

Kisa- uh huh

Hiro- don't they need to breath?

LOTL- I don't know Hmmmm oh well next dare from xFadexToxBlackx again

Everyone- RUN FOR COVER!

this story is pure awesomeness.  
and Hatori: people obsess over you because you're so CUTE:D

I'm giving you all a dare.  
umm...  
make Hatori dirty dance with Rin and put his hands in inappropriate places.  
remember, Hatori, its cause I love you. : )

Hatori- that helps _so _much

Shigure- poor Hari he is the most abused

LOTL- I hope I can do this right..

Yuki- what?

LOTL- make there be music remember I'm only a co host

Ritsu- I'M SORRY IT'S ALL MY FAULT I'M NOT WORTH LIVING!

Kureno- didn't you give IAG a tail

LOTL- did you have to bring that up?….ok I can do this….

(Background music comes on)

LOTL- YES HAHA! I DID IT! Know start dancing and remember Rin no killing till after..

Rin- screw you all…

(They both start dancing VERY dirty)

Tohru- (covers Kisa's eyes)

Everyone- whoa…………

(after eight minutes)

LOTL- ok you're done

Rin- bastard

SLAP!

Hatori- shoot me now!

(Buzzer goes off)

Kyo- what the hell!

IAG- that was heaven……..ok on with the next dare (is suddenly behind LOTL)

LOTL- AHHHH! Lord don't do that

IAG- but I always do that it's fun

LOTL- don't you do that at school enough?

IAG- uh no…..now I saw the whole thing and those were good dares know the next one is from xmadenxofxthexdragonx

Hm... lets see here...I'm such a sick person but here goes! Muhahahaha! okay...1) Akito has to make out with Tohru...Muahaha! 2) Kyo has to you know with Tohru! and last but not least... Ayame has to kiss Tohru for hover long you like but the max is 6 mins...  
Oh and can't forget LOTL and IAG can I muhahahaha has very evil look in eye's You both have to kiss the person you hugged earlier...for lets see 2 min's... okay bye update soon bye!

IAG- Ok THERE I DRAW THE LINE!

IAG- see that up there LINE IS DRAWN here is a new rule NO SEX! The cast will only do that of their own free will, not trying to be mean or anything but that's not something I want to force them to do!

LOTL- very well said

IAG- thanks

Cast- whew…..

IAG- ok Akito…Tohru you can make out over there (point to couch)

Kyo- where did that come from!

IAG- I zapped it earlier

Everyone- o…….

(Akito and Tohru start to make out not willingly well maybe Akito….)

IAG- well while they're busy LOTL you have to kiss Kyo for two minutes

LOTL- (hair stands on edge then fake indifference) ….ok……

IAG- and I kiss Haru…..again ……cool!

(LOTL starts kissing Kyo and IAG starts kissing Haru)

Kagura- A rival…I must kill her! (runs at LOTL but is grabbed by uhh a invisible force)

IAG- (pulls away from Haru for a moment) we still have power remember (kisses Haru again)

(Yuki is glaring at Akito while steaming next to Kagura who is also steaming)

(after two minutes)

IAG- Ok Akito and Tohru you are done

(everyone stops kissing whoever they were)

IAG- it's amazing how my Dare show has turned into a make out show strange… now Ayame is going to kiss Tohru for umm 30 seconds

Ayame- such a short time but I will indeed honor the princess with a kiss

Hatori- I think Tohru's been in complete shock since the lie detector scene

LOTL- strange

(Ayame kisses Tohru for 30 seconds, Yuki and Kyo try to not kill him)

IAG- ok we have time for one more dare from Kitkit Sohma again

OhOh! Also, I dare everyone on the Furuba Dare Show (AND I MEAN EVERYONE!)To drink 20 Gallons of beer! And I don't care about that drinking age crap!

IAG- I have a bad feeling about this……oh well….

(IAG zaps A LOT of beer there)

LOTL- well……….cheers

Kisa- Sissy should I really drink this?

Tohru- well…no……

(They all slowly start to drink)

IAG- this cannot be good

(Suddenly a bunch of cops burst in!)

Cop- Ok who's in charge here!

IAG- well that would be us…

Cop- you are under arrest for illegal underage drinking and providing minors with alcohol!

IAG- but…

LOTL- but…

Cop- you are both under arrest anything you do or say can be used against you in the court of law, you have your right to a lawyer….

(Handcuffs both IAG and LOTL)

IAG + LOTL- wait we're innocent

Cop- and we'll have to take all this beer

IAG- curse you Kitkit!

(IAG + LOTL are dragged out)

Cast- YAY!

Camera Man- Hello I'm the camera man my name is Merle, IAG and LOTL my bosses have asked me to give this message to all you viewers out there. Please submit all your reviews to the latest chapter so that they see it thank you. Oh and also they said "WE'LL BE BACK…………WITH WEAPONS!"

("Forever" starts playing in the background)


	11. Episode 11

IAG- get these stupid handcuffs off me!

LOTL- why don't you use your MHP?

IAG- oh yeah…….(zaps off handcuffs)

Kyo- oh great they're back……..

IAG-we told you we would and look we have weapons (holds out a katana and that other sword I don't remember the name)

Cast- O.O

IAG- oh yeah welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- and I believe we are starting a new dare

IAG- because the last one GOT US ARESTED!

LOTL- the next dare is from Sakimi1014

hey!I'm falling out of my chair laughing! (literally) Ow! It hurts (clutches stomach) anyway...my dare...Hm...  
I dare Yuki to slap the president of his fan club across the face.

Yuki- uh……….

IAG- I think all LOTL and me can say is FINALY!

LOTL- for two reasons she's obsessed with Yuki and two she's obsessed with Yuki

(IAG zaps Motoko aka fan club president there)

Motoko- huh where am I huh! Yuki what are you doing here?

IAG- this is my

LOTL- ahem

IAG- I mean our dare show for the Fruits Basket cast we just didn't want to invite you

Motoko- you mean I'm on air with Yuki ……

IAG- actually you just so happen to be in a dare…Hehe

LOTL- go on Yuki go on and do it…….

(Yuki walks up to her)

Motoko- Yuki?

Yuki- do I really have to do this?

IAG- YES!

(Yuki slaps Motoko)

Motoko- but Yuki…..I….love you………(is holding her face)

IAG- lookie I got a photo

LOTL- be sure to make me a copy

IAG- ok now wait….

(Zaps a broken Motoko back to wherever she was before)

IAG- ok now next dare from Echo-Waters

Cast- oh…no…

I dont hate Hatori T T poor Hatori... but that doesn't mean I'll stop the Hatori abuse! (I'll lay off today)

okay... I dare IT (Akito) to put on a girly princess dress and skip around throwing flowers (same as Hatori)

I dare Kureno to say to arisa's (uotani) face that he's married and has children, and is extremely faithful to his "wife"

I dare IAG and LOTL to make Yuki drink a keg of beer, then hand him a pair of nun chucks

IAG- oh no beer…..

LOTL- well Akito here the outfit go change (hands Akito the dress, Akito goes into the closet)

IAG- Ok Kureno you know what to do

Kureno- Grrr………

(Kureno walks over to Arisa)

Arisa- huh it's you what are you doing here?

Kureno- I'm a Sohma but I have to tell that…..

IAG- go on!

Arisa- you're a Sohma?

Kureno- yes I also have a wife and children and I'm very loyal to them so I'm sorry if I lead you on….

Arisa- WHAT? Why you bastard!

Kureno- I said I was sorry (is being chased by Arisa and her metal bar)

IAG- ok well moving on to Akito (Akito walks back in with the dress on)

Cast- oh my lord……..

LOTL- MY EYES!

IAG- (shudder) well here's your basket

(Akito starts skipping around and throwing flowers)

Akito- tralalalalalalalaalalalalala!

IAG- did that dare include singing?

LOTL- I don't know well zap a keg of beer

IAG- I hope we don't get arrested again

Yuki- no you can't make me!

IAG- oh yeah (pours the whole thing down his throat)

Yuki- (choke gag)

LOTL- here are your nun chucks

(Yuki look up drunk looking and looks at the nun chucks)

Yuki- wohoo! Look at me I'm a ninja (starts running around waving the nun chucks)

Tohru- Ahh Yuki be careful

Yuki- hyaa! Fear em! (Starts to hit the equipment)

IAG- hey watch then stuff

Yuki- osdfsdljfhiasbvfiaylsdhbgfipyasvifyvasilhb

IAG- (zaps Yuki)

Yuki- huh what happened

LOTL- that was…entertaining now next dare from namelessshadow

IAG- oh and Akito do us all a favor and GO CHANGE!

Akito- humph (goes to change)

There are three dares  
1.make Tohru get a job in a strippers club for like 1 month  
2.force Rin to sleep with every guy except Haru  
3.make Yuki to tango with Haru

Cast- strippers club?

IAG- hmm oh well poor Tohru

Cast- ATTACK! (All the cast except Tohru and Akito attack IAG)

IAG- help me! (Is soon engulfed in the cast attack)

(After 10 minutes)

IAG- (zaps herself not wanting another tail) ok I won't do the stripper club thing

Cast- humph good!

LOTL- that was scary..

IAG- how come you didn't help!

LOTL- it was scary…

IAG- whatever Rin tonight you sleep with Hmmmm Hiro

Hiro –huh?

Rin- you bitch I thought you said no sex!

IAG- I did you only have to sleep in the same bed as them what you do is up to you……did you call me a bitch?

Rin- you going to do something about that?

IAG- yeah watch this (zaps Rin)

Rin- well too bad because it didn't hurt

IAG- watch and learn

Rin- huh (hair slowly turns pink)

IAG- and victory is mine!

Rin- (twitch)

LOTL- now the tango thing

IAG- (twitch)

LOTL- come on you have to do it, it's not like they're together or something..

IAG- fine….(zaps on tango music)

Yuki- I can't believe I'm about to do this

IAG- oh suck it up you did that waltz with Kyo after all…

Hatsuharu- (indifference)

LOTL- just dance!

(They both start dancing)

IAG- (twitch)

Shigure- (taking pictures)

Ritsu- I'M SORRY IT'S ALL MY FAULT MAY SOMEONE KILL ME!

IAG- I will soon if you don't shut up!

Ritsu- OH NO I OFFENDED YOU!

LOTL- I think they're done

IAG- finally (zaps off music) there now next dare is from Silver Moonlight

Hi! Do ya remember me? Here's my dares:  
1.Hatori has to wear a slutty outfit, run outside in public, scream "I'm a slutty stripper", AND make out with whoever IAG chooses.  
2.Yuki has to wear a wedding dress with heels, wear a girl wig, go in public and say "I just got married!"  
3. Kyo has to wear a tux  
4.Ayame's shop is burned down again  
5.Ritsu has to go throughout 5 episodes without saying sorry. (PS he has to be included with all 5 shows.)  
MWAHAHAHA -evil grin- don't ya just love my dares?

IAG- this shall be very amusing….first off Ritsu you are not allowed to say sorry till episode 16.

Ritsu- but but (muffles himself)

IAG- whatever (zaps three bag here) now here are the outfits Hatori and Yuki you dress first

Yuki- why me!

Hatori- (is close to tears)

IAG- go change while I think about whom he'll make out with…

(Yuki and Hatori go change)

LOTL- why don't you just zap them into the outfits

IAG- oh duh! (hits herself)

(IAG zaps all three into their outfits)

Arisa- this is the funniest thing since well ever!

IAG- ok Hatori and Yuki time to go outside

(IAG drags them both out there)

IAG- now you both have something to say

Hatori- someone shot me………. I'M A SLUTTY STRIPPER

(A few civilians walk be faster)

Little Girl- Look Mommy there's a man in a his underwear and some lady got married

Mother- come on dear don't make eye contact….

IAG- Hehe and Yuki……

Yuki-……. I just got married!

(Some people stare)

Bystander- did that women marry a stripper?

IAG- ok time to go inside before someone calls the police

(They go back inside)

Tohru- but it looks nice

Kyo- damnitt women zap this thing off me!

IAG- hmmm no

Ayame- please don't do it to my shop again

Mine- please we'll do anything!

IAG- uh no (snaps her fingers again) your shop is now and her (zaps Hatori and Yuki out of their outfits and into normal clothing)

LOTL- now whom is Hatori going to make out with?

IAG- uhh…Hm……how about Tohru

Tohru- huh?

Yuki + Kyo- WHAT!

Hatori- ………………!

IAG- yeah you can use the couch now go MAKE OUT!

Hatori- (stuck in place)

Tohru- (stunned)

IAG- just go make out it's only for a bit

(They very reluctantly begin to lol make out)

Kisa- Sissy…..is…making out…..with grandpa Hatori………(Shudder)

Hiro- why does everyone like that fake girl!

IAG- well the next dare is from iujhnjnjkngjkl

Cast- lord help us…

I dare Yuki to run around the studio screaming I HATE MY BROTHER I HATE MY BROTHER I HATE MY BROTER I HATE MY BROTERand I dare Rin to take revenge on who ever she wants.

Yuki- finally! Someone understands how I feel……….

Ayame- no dare will break us apart!

IAG- well Yuki you may begin

(Yuki starts running)

Yuki- I HATE MY BROTHER I HATE MY BROTHER I HATE MY BROTHER!

Ayame- he…he really does hate me…….

Rin- revenge…………….who will I take revenge on……….I have pink hair…..because of…HER! (points at IAG)

IAG- me?

Rin- yes you and the dare said anyone I want

IAG- heeellllppppp!

(Rin is chasing IAG around the studio)

LOTL- uhh…….you guys can stop making out now

(Hatori and Tohru jump up)

Hatori- uhh…..

Kyo- sick…….

IAG- WHY…YOU!

Rin- me what?

IAG- take this! (zaps Rin )

Rin- (in a pink bikini) you wench!

IAG- HAHAHAHA!

Momiji- anyone want some candy

IAG- anyway (fixes shirt) next dare from The Broken And fallen Angel of Death

Cast- NOOOOOOO!

Hehe! So funny! I know you might be annoyed with me but... I have dares.

I dare Hatori to let Shigure contaminate his mind with dirty thoughts for half an hour. (that's what my friends are trying to do to me!) And like what xFadexToxBlackx said, it's because I love you Hatori!

I dare IAG and LOTL to kiss their most hated characters on the neck. Tehe! 

And I dare Yuki to strip with 'I'm So Sexy' in the background. I don't really know if that's a song but who cares! And remember Yuki, it's because I love you.

Oh yeah, Kyo kisses IT (Akito) on the cheek. Hope to see more soon. It's because I love you Kyo! Kyo-kun! XD

Shigure- well let's begin

IAG- you can sit on the couch

Hatori- I can't take this much longer

Ritsu- I feel bad for you

Shigure- high school girls in swim suits

IAG + LOTL- (twitch)

Kureno- who are your least favorite characters?…well for IAG it's obvious

IAG- uhh…… lord……….help…….me…

LOTL- who is my least favorite char……I think Hiro…

(Both kiss there least favorite character on the neck IAGRin LOTLHiro)

IAG- argghhh MOUTHWASH! (IAG runs to the bathroom)

Shigure- porn sites….

LOTL- now Kyo kiss Akito and the cheek…

Kyo- do I have a choice?

LOTL- no…

(IAG comes back in)

(Kyo kisses Akito and the cheek)

IAG- whoa that was a nice welcome…..

Kyo- ugghhh it burns!

LOTL- well aside from the Hatori thing we have a new Serena-Demon Goddess

ROFL...

one word: wow

Anyways, I dare IAG and LOTL and Momiji and a Sohma with a deep voice to sing "Freckles" from Rurouni Kenshin or "Butterfly" from DDR.

And if you can drag Uo over, get her to sing "Redneck Woman". ROFL

IAG- cool I have that song……

LOTL- which one?

IAG- Butterfly

LOTL- oh yeah you sing don't you?

IAG- uh huh you sing a little too don't you

Momiji- yay we get to sing!

Arisa- I won't do it (hits the wall with iron pipe)

IAG- uhh ok and Kureno you have a deep enough voice come sing'

Kureno- what an awful show…

(IAG takes out stereo and one of her cd)

IAG- Butterfly is on this one……ok there here are microphones

(Butterfly comes on)

Ai yai i yai  
Ai yai i yai  
Ai yai i yai  
Where's my samurai?(Whoo!)

I've been searching for a man,  
All across Japan.  
Just to find, to find my samurai.  
Someone who is strong,  
But still a little shy,  
Yes, I need, I need my samurai.

Ai yai i yai,  
I'm your little butterfly,  
Green, black and blue  
Make the colors in the sky.

Ai yai i yai,  
I'm your little butterfly,  
Green, black and blue  
Make the colors in the sky.

I've been searching through the woods,  
And high above the hills.  
Just to find, to find my samurai.  
Some who won't regret,  
To keep me in his net.  
Yes I need, I need my samurai.

Ai yai i yai,  
I'm your little butterfly,  
Green, black and blue  
Make the colors in the sky.

Ai yai i yai,  
I'm your little butterfly,  
Green, black and blue  
Make the colors in the sky.

Ai yai i yai  
Ai yai i yai  
Ai yai i yai  
Where's my samurai?(Whoo!)

Ai yai i yai,  
I'm your little butterfly,  
Green, black and blue  
Make the colors in the sky.

Tohru- wow our hosts aren't that bad at singing

IAG + LOTL- we told yah!

LOTL- we sing Evanescence sometimes

Kureno- I'll never live it down

Momiji- that was fun!

IAG- ok our next dare is from xmadenxofxthexdragonx

Its me again Sorry about the Tohru and Kyo thing it wasn't me it was my sis she's such a pervert.. but anyway.. since no one has made Hari kiss anyone I will...Hari has to kiss Hm... Tohru muhahahaha! and Kyo and Yuki have to kiss her for 10 mins... Its only cause those ppl are my faves... so remember its cause I love y'all!

This show is so funny love it! see ya!

IAG- it's alright and actually Hatori already kissed Tohru but oh well…

Hatori- again?

Yuki + Kyo- ……………………………………………………………………………..

Hatori- (kisses Tohru)

IAG- that was indifferent and Kyo can go first and use the couch….. let me set the timer

(Kyo and Tohru begin to kiss)

IAG- they almost look happy about it…..

LOTL- …………………..

(After 10 minutes)

IAG- Ok you guys can stop now!

Yuki- stupid cat….

Kyo- you girly man! I'll laugh when some dare makes you strip!

Tohru- (confused)

IAG- now Yuki and Tohru must kiss for 10 minutes

(They begin to kiss)

LOTL- Aww they make such a perfect couple (we are Yuki/Tohru fans all the way!)

IAG- Aww it makes me want to cry…

LOTL- oh no not another hang over!

(After 10 minutes)

IAG- stop already!

(They both blush and stop)

Kyo- (twitch…twitch….twitch)

IAG- ha-ha now another dare from Fade To Black

Gosh. How funny can you get?

I dare Hiro to seduce one of the cops.

IAG- I'm not going to bring another cop here so……Hiro tomorrow's episode bring a seduced cop with you and that will complete the dare!

LOTL- until then see yah next time in THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

IAG- BYE!

("Forever" starts playing)


	12. Contest!

IAG- Hi this is not an episode I am now hosting a contest, in episodes 17- 20 there will be a guest star in each one. So there will be four winners and those winners will get to be in one episode and get to do almost anything they want.

The rules are simple

In episodes 7-11 I have a hidden message you must email that message to me along with…

If you like the Kyo/Tohru or Yuki/Tohru paring

Your favorite character

Your least favorite character

What you would do if you got the part

How obsessed with Fruits Basket you are

How well do you know it

And what do you think about Me and LOTL

Oh and of course your email

All this must be entered but NOT IN A REVIEW! They must be emailed! If you don't know then my email is animeinugirl() This is not a timed contest it's not first come first serve it's who I think is most qualified, please if you do not win no flames and do not enter more than once. If you are a winner I will email you back with certain information about your entrance and etc……Thank You


	13. Episode 12

IAG- Hello all welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

LOTL- I hope you all saw the dare show contest it will run until episode 16

Cast- contest?

IAG- yes we are allowing 7 guest stars to appear

Cast- (wide eyed horror, then a look of revenge)

LOTL- geeze make up your mind..

IAG- oh yeah Hiro did you bring a seduced cop?

Hiro- (points sullenly behind him to a seduced cop)

Seduced Cop- what a cute boy and he's so mature…

IAG- (snort) mature

LOTL- so then we move on to a different dare

IAG- (zaps away cop) yeah this one is from Silver Moonlight

Kyo- aw hell

Hi thx for putting my dares! Here's another cast:  
1. Hiro has to wear a...hm.the thing he hates the most and tell Tohru he loves her  
2Make Tohru and Kyo make out for about eh...half an hour! (Sigh) You know they end up together in the Manga  
3Hatori has to...eat the most disgusting thing the cast can think of and he CAN NOT vomit it  
4 Kureno has to get locked up with Shigure, Ayame, and Hatori as well.  
5 Kyo has to eat a ton (literally) of leeks.  
6 Tohru has to wear a punk rocker clothes go out in public and yell "I have a criminal record!"  
-  
Hehe Enjoy! -Evil smile-

IAG- this is MY show I can pair up anyone I want!

LOTL- calm down………..you always pair up who you want……

Kyo- this woman hates me…….

Hatori- (twitch)

Tohru- eh?

IAG- lets do the last two dares first one sec (zaps Tohru into punk rocker clothing and zaps a ton of leeks there)

Tohru- please don't make me do this if Mom were to do I don't know what I would do

Kyo- I can't eat these all!

(IAG pushes Tohru outside)

IAG- do it or else!

Tohru- …………

IAG- don't make me do something I might regret

Tohru- I have a criminal record!

Bystander- is that Tohru Honda I always thought she was such a good girl..

Tohru- (looks close to tears)

(They come back in to see a VERY green leek eating Kyo….Yuki's taking pictures)

IAG- wow…….can't you eat any faster?

Kyo- afggghhhghhhhhggghhgghghgggh!

IAG- huh?

LOTL- I guess now we make Hiro say I love you Tohru and make him wear what he hates most..

IAG- ok I think I know what it is ZAP!

Hiro- (pink tux)

Kisa- Hiro I think it looks cute

Hiro- I hate you!

IAG- now tell Tohru you love her

(Hiro walks…..well is shoved next to Tohru)

Hiro- Tohru I………………………………… love………………..you…………..

Kisa-………………..

Tohru- eh?…………..

LOTL- is Kyo done yet?

Ritsu-……………………………………(has nothing else to say if he can't say sorry)

Hatori- he has a little more to do

IAG- well I guess I don't think we can lock up Kureno, Ayame, Hatori, and Shigure they are involved in other dares…….

Hatori- thank god………………

LOTL- now Hatori has to eat something really gross

IAG- o I know! Mashed pig intestines!

LOTL- eeeewwwwww……..

Hatori- what?

IAG- mashed pig intestines…my sister's ex-boyfriend use to eat them..(shudders at memory)

Yuki- that's just sick….

Kyo- uugggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

Kagura- Kyo's done

IAG- one sec (zaps mashed pig intestines in front of Hatori) EAT!….

LOTL- and you two start making out the couch is right there

(They start making out and Yuki is flaming with steam coming out his ears)

IAG-scary

(Hatori starts eating and turns green rather quickly)

LOTL- I guess we move on to another dare while we wait….

IAG- ok we have a dare from Tear Of Dreams

Loving the show! Hatori, I love you, but I ADORE the abuse to you!  
1.I dare Hatori to sing 'Shake That' by Eminem along with...HIRO!  
2.Hm...Shigure has to smell Ayame's butt. (he's a dog right?)  
3. And for IAG and LOTL to rebuild Ayame's shop.  
4. Oh and Momiji needs to dress up and act like a gangster for an hour.

I'll be back

IAG- I have to rebuild it……AGAIN!

LOTL- what strange dares……….

IAG- well Hatori you are the most abused

Ayame- HAH!

Hiro- I'm not singing!

Shigure-………………………

Momiji- gangster?

IAG- well first (zaps Momiji so that he's wearing a long coat, cigar, and a gun) now you just act like the godfather or something…

Momiji- youz talking ta me?

LOTL- wow he can imitate well

IAG- and I'll zap Hiro and Hatori so that they know the lyrics (zaps them both)

LOTL- ok you may begin…..

Shady, Aftermath  
There she goes shaking that ass on the floor  
Bumpin and grindin that pole  
The way she's grindin that pole  
I think I'm losing control

_Verse 1 - Eminem_

Get buzzed, get drunk, get crunked, get fucked up  
Hit the strip club don't forget ones get your dick rubbed  
Get fucked, get sucked, get wasted, shit faceted  
Pasted, blasted, puke drink up, get a new drink  
Hit the bathroom sink, throw up  
Wipe your shoe clean, got a routine  
Knowin still got a few chunks on your shoestring  
Showin I was dehydrated till the beat vibrated  
I was revibed as soon as this Bitch gyrated  
And hips and licked them lips and that was it  
I had to get Nate Dogg here to sing some shit

_Verse 2 - Nate Dogg_

Two to the one from the one to the three  
I like good pussy and I like good trees  
Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe  
And I get more ass than a toilet seat  
Three to the one from the one to the three  
I met a bad bitch last night in the D  
Let me tell you how I made her leave with me  
Conversation and Hennessey  
I've been to the muthafuckin mountain top  
Heard muthafuckers talk, seen 'em drop  
If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock  
And when I bust yo ass I'm gonna continue to rock  
Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet  
It's real easy just follow the beat  
Don't let that fine girl pass you by  
Look real close cause strobe lights lie

_Verse 3 - Nate Dogg_

We bout to have a party (turn the music up)  
Let's get it started (Go head shake your butt)  
I'm lookin for a girl with a body and a sexy strut  
Wanna get it poppin baby step right up  
Some girls they act retarded  
Some girls are bout it bout it  
I'm lookin for a girl that will do whatever the fuck  
I say everyday she be givin it up

_Chorus - Nate Dogg_

Shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Come on girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Ohh girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Come on girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me

_Verse 4 - Eminem_

I'm a menace, a dentist, an oral hygienist  
Open your mouth for about four or five minutes  
Take a little bit of this fluoride rinse  
Swish but don't spit it, swallow and I'll finish  
Yeah me and Nate d-o double g  
Looking for a couple bitches with some double d's  
Pop a little champagne and a couple E's  
Slip it in her bubbuly, we finna finna have a party

_Verse 5 - Nate Dogg_

Have a party (turn the music up)  
Let's get it started (Go head shake your butt)  
I'm lookin for a girl I can fuck in my hummer truck  
Apple Bottom jeans and a big Ol' slut  
Some girls they act retarded  
Some girls are bout it bout it  
I want a bitch that sit at the crib with no panties on  
Knows that she can but she won't say no  
Now look at this lady all in front of me, sexy as can be  
Tonight I want a slut, will you be mine?  
I heard you was freaky from a friend of mine

_Bridge - Eminem_

Now I hope you don't get mad at me  
But I told Nate you was a freak  
He said he wants a slut, hope you don't mind  
I told him how you like it from behind

_Chorus - Nate Dogg_

Shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Cmon girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Ohh girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
Cmon girl, shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me  
We bout' to have a party (turn the music up)  
Let's get it started (go ahead shake your butt)  
I'm lookin for a girl with a body and a sexy strut  
Wanna get it poppin baby step right up  
Some girls they act retarded  
Some girls are bout it bout it  
I'm lookin for a girl that will do whatever the fuck  
I say everyday she be givin it up

_Outro - Eminem_

There she goes, shaking that ass on the floor  
Bumpin and grindin that pole  
The way she's grindin that pole  
I think I'm losing control

God, come one

_Eminem makes noises_

I ain't leavin' without you bitch

Come here home with me

And my boy, and his boy, and his boy, and his gurl

haha, Nate Dogg

IAG- (twitch) I have heard that song SO many time on the radio!

Momiji- shut your trap sister!

IAG- (twitch) look kid don't press your luck rabbit feet are considered lucky remember

LOTL- now a Shigure has to sniff Ayame's butt ….strange

Ayame- uh………………

Shigure- whatever (sniffs Ayame butt)

IAG- wow I didn't have to force him to do it……

Shigure- smells like lilacs

Ayame- I bath often…

LOTL- too much info…..!

IAG- lilacs?

Momiji- I've killed for less than that

IAG- this is going to get SO annoying!

Mine- now fix our SHOP!

IAG- (humph) fine (snaps fingers ) there it's fixed

LOTL- but isn't it nice to do something good?

IAG- no

LOTL- well let's move onto the next dare from Kitkit Sohma (again)

I am so evil. evil laugh

1. I dare Haru to get drunk then walk around the city to see what he does...  
2. I dare Momiji to eat all the candy in the world  
3. I dare IAG to bring one of the cast from Inuyasha and make them do a dare that LOTL makes up!  
4. hmm...looks to side I wonder...GET AYA, SHIGURE,and HARI DRUNK!  
5. I dare Hiro to listen to the Banana Phone Song for 10 hours.

LMAO updated soon!

IAG- Haru………….drunk………..(is thinking) do you think he'll go black?

Hatori- most likely…..

Hatsuharu- drunk?

LOTL- strange…oh well

IAG- weird…oh well (dumps a whole lotta beer down his throat)

LOTL- lets throw him out side (LOTL throws him outside)

Hatsuharu- The grass is greener on the other side!

Kyo- he's singing!

IAG- well he's starting to walk so let's wait a while then see what he did….

Momiji-how fun!

LOTL- you kid are crazy!

IAG- I doubt he can even do it…….this is going to take a lot of power (tries to zap all the candy in the world there)

(The room fills with candy)

Kyo- HEELLLLLPPPPPP!

Momiji- Super bunny to the rescue! (starts eating the candy)

(30 minutes later)

Momiji- (burp) excuse me….

IAG- he….he ate it all

LOTL- HE'S NOT HUMAN!

IAG- hey that's my line!

LOTL- hey sue me!

IAG- whatever……should we check on Haru now?

Hatori- you won't have too (points at TV)

Yuki- since when was there a TV

IAG- (shrugs)

TV News Person- There have been multiple reports of a multi colored youth destroying the whole downtown…..

LOTL- hey that's Haru!

IAG- I better go get him (Zaps away)

Hiro- How come she gets to leave whenever she wants huh

Ritsu-she's the host she can do whatever she wants

LOTL- and the monkey is right…moving on till she gets back but I don't know how to zap beer a character or music…wait music I can do (zaps headphones playing the Banana Phone Song on it)

Hiro- NO!

LOTL- (puts the headphones on his head)

Hiro- (Twitch)

Kisa- so he's going to be like that for ten hours?

ZAP!

LOTL- Hey!

IAG- we're back (next to a soaked Haru)

Hatsuharu- you're cute

IAG- I think I like him better when he's drunk..

LOTL- he's white but drunk be serious

IAG- I was just joking (makes Haru sit down) STAY!

Cast- ok…..

IAG- so what did you do so far?

LOTL- just the Hiro music one

IAG- ok so which character should I zap here?

LOTL- Sesshomaru!

IAG- of course..

Kyo- who?

IAG- the only character she likesas much asyou

LOTL- bring him bring him bring him!

IAG- ok ok sheesh (zaps Sesshomaru)

Sesshomaru- (with sword raised) die Inuyas- (looks around)

Kyo- she likes HIMas much asme?

LOTL- EEEEEEE it's Sesshomaru

Sesshomaru-are you referring to this Sesshomaru

IAG- why does he always say that? LOTL just make up a dare or I will!

LOTL- uh…uh…..uh….uh….uh….uh….uh…..uh….

IAG- fine I will, Sesshomaru I dare that everything you wear including your hair to be dyed pink!

Sesshomaru- pink?

LOTL- does he know what pink is

Momiji- what's the big fluffy think?

IAG- wouldn't we all want to know…

LOTL- there's a debate wither it's a tail or a boa

Sesshomaru- this Sesshomaru does not wear pink nor does he collaborate with mere mortals

Haru- traitor!

Sesshomaru- ?

IAG- ignore him he's drunk

Kyo- hey pal I don't know what you are but being mortal is fine!

LOTL- he's a demon

Kyo- o…

Tohru- demon?

IAG- he's from another anime Inuyasha

Sesshomaru- it's called Inuyasha?

LOTL- yeah considering he's the main character

IAG- ok I've had enough of this!

Cast- oh no….

ZAP!

Sesshomaru- (clothing, hair, boa/tail thing turn pink)

Rin- she did that to me too

IAG- shut up donkey

Rin- (twitch) donkey!

IAG- yeah you're more a donkey than a horse

Sesshomaru- this Sesshomaru is not amused

IAG- you were fighting with Inuyasha were you not

Sesshomaru-yes……..

IAG- they probably miss you (zaps him away)

LOTL- now he has to fight Inuyasha pink…I find that I'm both horrified and amused

IAG- isn't it great , well now to get them drunk you do Ayame I'll do Shigure we''' do Hatori last

Hatsuharu- (stands up)

IAG- are you still drunk? (Holds up hand) how many fingers do I have up

Hatsuharu- five…

IAG- ok he's not drunk now to the other drunks

(Both get the two guys drunk)

Ayame- lace is pretty

Shigure- Hehe writer not poet!

Hatori- idiots

IAG- now you

Hatori- no..

IAG- yes (dumps beer down his throat)

Hatori- (hic) calling doctor romance!

Kyo- that's just creepy

(Hatori, Shigure, and Ayame start singing….badly)

IAG- O.K.… well let's move on to the next dare from xFadexToxBlackx

Hahaha.  
I dare Shigure to pour oil all over Tohru. And French kiss her. While making out.

And I dare Akito to grope Kyo, Yuki, Hatori, and Hiro.

Have you realized nobody dared Kisa?  
That's good.  
I don't have the heart to poor Kisa. She's too cute.

IAG- I know she's SO cute (hugs Kisa)

LOTL- can he do that when he's drunk

Kyo + Yuki- NO!

IAG- how do you french kiss someone when you're making out with them?

LOTL- I don't know hmm

Tohru- eh?

Shigure-oil!

Akito- ……………………………………

To Be Continued

IAG- Tune in next time for THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

("Forever" comes on)


	14. Chapter 13 Part 1

IAG- Grrr hello welcome to THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

Kyo- what's with her?

LOTL- if you haven't noticed she on crutches

Cast- o…

Tohru- what happened?

IAG- Grrr I pulled a leg muscle and it hurts like hell!

Kureno- so that means we don't have to do today's episode?

IAG- are you insane?

LOTL- oh yeah and characters in the anime watch out we just rewatched it all and now she might want revenge…

IAG- you're a big jerk! (She stomps Akito's foot take note she just zapped on high heels and used her other leg)

Shigure- ow..

IAG- and you punk you're so mean to Tohru (stomps Hiro's foot)

Hiro- ow!

IAG- and you are so cute! (Hugs Kisa)

LOTL- can we just get on with the dares

IAG- oh yeah……well uh Shigure if my memory is correct then pour oil over Tohru then French kiss her!

Yuki + Kyo- (twitch)

Shigure- whatever (pours oil all over Tohru)

Tohru- peh!

IAG- at least it wasn't hot oil

Shigure- (French kisses her)

Yuki + Kyo- (look very evil)

Shigure- Yuki and Kyo are scaring me TT

LOTL- next "It" has to grope Kyo, Yuki, Hatori and Hiro

IAG- gross!

Akito- (indifference)

(Akito gropes all listed above)

IAG- mentally scarred!

LOTL- ok the next dare is from Chris73

cry cry) my friend tortured me to give u a dare... i don't want to be hated though, i'm a pathetic sometimes... Hatori gets an hour break from the show and ... Ayame's and mine's shop is rebuilt. i hope no one hates me... i'm sry Furuba characters! plz forgive me!

IAG- -.- (sweat drop)

Cast- -.- ……….

Hatori- bye!

Cast- THAT'S NOT FAIR!

IAG- the shop is already rebuilt!

Hatori- enjoy the hour full of dares without me! (Hatori leaves)

LOTL- cheater……

IAG- well the next dare is from KattKMcAdam

Hey, i love your show , ok i got a... few dares.  
1. Tohru kiss Yuki for 30 minutes  
2. i dare Kyo to dress in drag and do the hula this one...not my fault, its my b/f, go get him if you want after  
3. i dare Hatori to kiss Akito for ten minutes  
4. i dare Yuki to dance with Tohru for a half an hour with the song "Can't Stop Falling in Love" from DDR.

ok that's it and remember, i only do that to Yuki and Tohru cause i love them and...my b/f and i just wanted to have fun with Kyo , bye

IAG- well Hatori is gone….lucky bastard

LOTL- well you two can start kissing

IAG- but first (zaps oil off Tohru)

Tohru- thanks

(They start kissing)

IAG- uhhhh does anyone here know what a drag is?

Everyone- no……

IAG- nuts then we can't do the dare

Kyo- yes!

IAG- well because they still have 28 minutes let's move on to the next dare from Echo-Waters again

Cast- SNARL!

wow... 0.0 everyone hates me... well anyhow...

I dare Kagura to run out into the streets and yell "I LOVE PERVERTED NOVELISTS!"

I dare Hatori to copy (imitate) Momiji for the rest of the episode (yes i'm back to Hatori torture)

I dare Yuki to act like a military cadet for the rest of the episode.

I dare Kyo to drink a keg of beer and for IAG and LOTL to hand him my precious shiny nun chucks (which is currently hanging on my closet door)

I dare Haru and IT (as you probably know by now, Akito) to giggle and gossip and whisper like girly-girls

IAG- once again Hatori is not here so Kagura let's go outside for a minute

(They both go outside)

IAG- ok Kagura run into the street and yell….

Kagura- (runs into street) I LOVE PERVERTED NOVELISTS!

Bystander- I'm not going to walk in this street anymore

(They go back inside)

Shigure- Kagura I didn't know you cared

IAG- ok well when Yuki's AHEM done he has to act like some military dude

LOTL- but for now here Kyo (dumps a keg of beer down his throat)

Kyo- (hic)

IAG- and (nun chucks appear in her hands) here (hands Kyo them)

Kyo- WHOOHOHOHOHHO I'm scary!

IAG- -.- ………

Kyo- look I'm Sasuke!

LOTL- isn't that a character from Naruto?

IAG- that's just rude! And he's one of my favorite charrs and he doesn't use nun chucks!

Hatsuharu- I thought I was your favorite character _at least because of that you go easy on me_

IAG- you are but Sasuke is up there with a lot of other people

Kyo- lookie at me I'm Kohaku

LOTL- from Inuyasha?

IAG- he's a demon slayer!

Kyo- whoooooooooooo!

IAG- ½ hour over stop kissing now dance!

(Yuki and Tohru stop kissing)

Yuki- yes Sir! (salutes)

IAG- good he noticed the dare (Can't Stop Falling In Love starts playing)

(They start dancing)

Kyo- ME!

IAG- ok officially annoyed! (water appears out of nowhere above Kyo)

SPLASH!

Kyo- (shakes his head) BITCH!

IAG- (sigh) now Haru and It have to act like girly girls (shudder)

Akito- pshehehehehe and then he psasasasasasa and so dsjknfdjfjd asjdnsbnfjasbf

Hatsuharu- hjgfhgcfhdgfxstxstesersegxsterstdtr so then swjnfjksfjksn

IAG- TT it breaks my heart to see him like that, that's good enough STOP!

LOTL- that's a relief now we move onto the next dare from Usako-chan'07

That was so freaking AWESOMELY HILARIOUS! Yuki/tohru all the way! Ooh, which leads me to a dare: i dare Tohru and Yuki and Kyo to have a wedding ceremony, with Yuki &Tohru as the 'happy couple' Kyo as the best man who gives the blessing and Hatori as the flower girl!

Everyone- major eye popping

Arisa- GAK!

Hana- I'm going to cry

Kyo- NO WAY IN HELL!

IAG- that is…

LOTL- strange

IAG- sudden

LOTL- that too

Yuki and Tohru- uhhhh………………

Hatori- flower girl?

Kyo- no way I'm way I'm being the best man at that rat's wedding

Ayame- oh I have the greatest outfits!

IAG- I'll guess we'll do it, tell me the outfits Ayame

Ayame- (whispers in IAG ear)

IAG- and me and LOTL want (whispers in his ear)

ZAP!

(Everyone is wearing wedding outfits except LOTL who is wearing a modern blue dress and IAG is wearing a Victorian black dress)

Kyo- you can't wear black to a wedding!

IAG- I can and I will

END OF PART ONE!

LOTL- see us next time in THE FRUITS BASKET DARE SHOW!

IAG- and please wait an episode before you do more dares I have like 2 ½ episodes worth of dares to get through before the guest stars

("Whenever, Wherever" yes new song comes on)


End file.
